Ford's "Fusion"

Before I start, I need to state for the record that there is no relationship between myself and Ford Motor Corporation. I do own and drive a 1998 Ford vehicle, however.

Having said that ...

In their "additional disclaimers" for the Ford Fusion it says twice "Do Not Drive Distracted." Twice. And then they give you a car that allows you to do just that. And in style, too.

To be perfectly honest, one could say the same thing about a CD player built in to a vehicle's factory stereo. "Don't play with the CD while driving!" You could also say that about the vehicle's tape deck (that is, if they still have tape decks,) "Don't play with the tape and try to drive! And then, as Jamie Hyneman (yes, the one from Mythbusters fame) would say "You heard him. Don't do it!"

And then they give you a vehicle that allows you to do just that. Here's one of their commercials from YouTube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jmyBp6QccxY (Well, the link to it anyway.)

The advert also says "Don't drive while distracted." But you know somebody's going to be doing just that...trying to drive while revising the playlist on the MP3 player.

Somebody's going to be driving while trying to carry on an argument with somebody. To be fair, they do this already. But they'll figure "Hey, my Fusion's handsfree, so I can cuss and give 'em the bird!" And you know somebody's going to do this ... again, because they do it already.

Personally, I'm waiting for some particular bone-head to be listening to the MP3 player and talking on the hands-free phone ... and moving to the beat of the music and not really caring about driving. Again, people do this already.

I'm probably the lone person on the planet that will be saying this, but this was not a smart move from the safety standpoint. and yes, they've got the "Don't Drive While Distracted," disclaimer ... several times ... but, c'mon. You KNOW that some idiot is going to do this. And I'll bet you their 'defense' will be "Well, if they thought it was that dangerous, they wouldn't have let me do it."

To be fair - it is possible to drive while not distracted. I've stated, several times, that I do have a cell phone. It doesn't have service, however. The only reason I still have it is because by law and agreement you have to be able to reach 911.

Even before I let the service expire I didn't talk on the phone much. That changed to at all after I nearly hit somebody ... and nearly got hit myself. "But what's the point of having the phone if you're not going to be using it?" somebody wrote to me. I wrote that person a book, which I won't rewrite here. Mostly.

When you drive, you should drive. You shouldn't be: (This is in my opinion only)

1) Talking on the cell about where you want to go out next
2) Purchasing tickets to the game using your mobile device
3) Redoing the playlist on your MP3 player
4) Texting
5) Talking on the cell phone
6) Using your cell phone to send/receive emails
7) Taking pictures using your phone or any other type of camera
8) Using any other type of mobile device
9) Doing your hair/nails
10) Reading the paper
11) Eating a bowl of cereal (which when he was done with it, he opened the door and poured out the milk from the bottom of the bowl. (The pouring out happened during a stop in traffic. And yes, I got pissed. But I figured "He probably thinks that he's the most important person on the planet so he figures no worries." ))

That list could be longer, of course. I saw on TV a while back about some "executive" who was talking on the phone and doing paperwork on the way to work. I wanted to reach through the TV and throttle him. Frankly, if he'd hit me I'd have given him a choice. "Are you alright? Good, good. Say, in looking in your vehicle, I see that you've got paperwork scattered on the floor along with your wireless device and your opened briefcase. Where you, perchance, doing paperwork while talking? You were? Fine. You've got a choice then: Which would you like me to shove up your stupid ass first, the phone or the briefcase? Don't worry, as hard as I'll be shoving, I promise they'll fit. Probably with room to spare."

But I think I reached my breaking point this past winter while I was on my way to the optometrist (eye doctor.) This was during one of our blizzards that dumped 14 inches on us. I'm a very safe driver, mainly because I DRIVE and not do something else.

So it was snowing, the wind was blowing, the drifts were forming and it was cold. And more than a few people were talking while trying to drive.

I need to get off my soapbox before I piss everybody off, but I really do think cell phones should be illegal to use in vehicles except in emergency situations. And ordering a pizza is not an emergency. Neither is texting (unless it's to law enforcement about something.) Time for that full disclosure thing: I have used my cell phone to call law enforcement while driving before. Several times, in fact.

But to return to the topic...I love many of the features of the Fusion. At least, those I've seen from the adverts or from the Fusion's webpage. I love the fuel mileage. I love the eco-friendly cloth seats, which are made from 85 per cent post-industrial materials. KUDOS to Ford for this.(*) But you can rip out the SYNC stuff. Frankly, there are too damn many distracted drivers out there already. Shame on you for giving them yet another distraction.

(*) - http://www.fordvehicles.com/cars/fusion/features/#page=Feature15